Physics lessons
by Crispyangelwings
Summary: A misty blue portal, two teenage fangirls, the avengers, a distorted storyline, spoilers, and crack, oh and swearing and also maybe some slash later on not certain yet but hey ho. T to be safe.
1. Chapter 1

**Well hello there person actually weird enough to click on this story. This is the a joke between me and my beta Loobylooxxx and this is the result, it was beta`d by Loobylooxxx and we appreciate reviews of our joint silliness. Notice the word count?**

"Uhhhhh Physics... Why do we have to suffer through this nonsense?!" Hannah groaned, giving up on the questions. "I mean at least you know what you`re doing Rebecca, you were in last lesson!".

"Just copy mine then, it`s not like we don`t always share work anyway..." replied Rebecca, still working on the questions. "I've never seen the point in momentum, if we never did any moving, all life's problems would be solved!"

"We also would starve to death and live in caves." pointed out Hannah, "And even worse, we would have no Supernatural, Doctor Who, Harry Potter, Percy Jackson, Mortal Instruments, Merlin, Sherlock or Avengers, I mean, what on earth would we do then? We might have to read Twilight!" she finished off, shuddering at the thought.

"Fine, you`ve made your poi- Why are you glowing?" said Rebecca, startled by the misty blue glow surrounding the end of the table next to her, and then as it engulfed her best friend, the creepy mist slowly creeping towards her.

"Balls!" she said, in true Bobby Singer fashion.

On queue, Hannah promptly vanished and the mist swirled round as if alive to face Rebecca.

"Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit! SIR! A creepy blue mist ate Hannah, I think you need to call the Ghostbusters or something..." she said, backing away from said creepy mist however in true self serving arrogance Claire, the true bitch that sat on the other side of Hannah, kicked the chair next to Rebecca over. Rebecca tripped over the chair, landing on the floor as the mist started cascading off the table and onto her head.

"Oh I`m really fucked now..." she said, before rolling under the table. Her movement was not fast enough and a tendril of the now viscous looking mist swirled round her ankle, before seeming to get a good grip and start to drag. Rebecca looked earnestly for a way of preventing herself from being dragged into the seemingly carnivorous mist, grabbed the nearest bags that were lying on the floor, which conveniently happened to be hers and Hannah`s. Unfortunately, in a competition of bags vs. solidifying misty stuff, the mist won, and Rebecca was dragged into the mist still holding onto both bags.

**Meanwhile, above the Atlantic Ocean in a large, hovering aircraft...**

"Director Fury, Sir, we're reading an energy surge similar to the levels we found when Thor came to Earth, only in the middle of New Orleans, Sir." Agent Hill said, looking up from the Starkpad she was reading off.

"Thor's already here, it's most likely a hostile. Get the Avengers mobilised. They need more teamwork practice, this might do the trick." Director Fury replied.

"But sir with Loki aboard-"

"No buts Agent Hill. Get them mobilised in ten, including Stark and Banner, even if it's a friendly we want them working together. Do I make myself clear Agent?"

"Yes Sir, I will issue the summons" replied Agent Hill, a faint trace of sarcasm leaking into her voice.

Surprisingly, under five minutes later, all of the Avengers were present and suited up, except for Dr. Banner, who obviously didn`t get a suit, except for a pair of extra stretchy pants.

"Avengers, we've had a peculiar signal from New Orleans, we want you to go and find whatever made it..."

**In a blue mist, between worlds ...**

"Oh Merlin, I really hope Supernatural Season 8 doesn`t fall out of my bag..." whispered Rebecca, whilst being transferred between worlds, at well past the speed of light. "I hope Hannah`s ok, if she`s not I`ll kill her myself..."

**^^^^ Word Count: 666 lol perfection. *Loobylooxxx get salt and holy water to douse crispyangelwings with for managing to write a chapter with 666 words in* **


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

**Hey look another update. I don`t think I put this last chapter but this is the same story as the one by madgirlwithwifi as we are the same person, I will be reposting all stories on this account and deleting that one eventually the reason is on my profile page . Hannah meets the floor and the Avengers and all readers get an example of how not to swear in public because no one will understand what you`re saying. With thanks to Mari (guest) for reviewing. And with much ado I do present Chapter 2...**

**P.S Please enjoy **

**P.P.S Please review or I will send Thor after you *Loobylooxxx licks lips at thought of crispyangelwings sending Thor after her* ;) xxx**

Falling off a one storey building isn`t the best way to start a new day on a separate universe, falling off a two storey building certainly puts you off walking for a while, but a three storey building was just plain ridiculous.

"Not even a pretty building... Made of ugly concrete" Hannah muttered, after luckily falling into a bush instead of dying. It still hurt though!

"Owwwww!" whined Hannah, deciding to just stay in the bush, which really was quite a comfortable shrub considering the fact that it could have impaled her. But then Hannah had always loved vegetation, like the nettles in Biology and the conkers from P.E. **(there is a back story to this!)**

Ultimately though, she decided that the bush was in fact performing no wonders on her back, so she stood, and promptly fell over with the shock of being in a completely different place. It looked urban, although she was on what was clearly the very outskirt. Looking down, she also realised that she was in school uniform in the middle of anywhere, all alone. Deciding that the best thing to do in this situation was to find somewhere to recover for a while, and think of a list of the most colourful and reference filled curse she could think of. Subsequently the curse consisted of the words:

"Oh rampaging mewling Bilgesnipe, may trout eat out you entrails and your genitals breed with the mouth of a stubborn sharp toothed goat, and your hair grow ever inwards, and may you move to the planet Clom, and live out the rest of your days with most boring squidgyness!"

Feeling mildly better, she tried to lift herself off the patch of grass she had been sitting on, leaning on a tree, however her legs were shaky now as the adrenalin had worn off. All in all, she decided just to curl up under her blazer and hope for the best.

Unfortunately, where inter-planetary travel happens, things rarely work out well, and when it is between parallel universes, it is generally even worse...

**3 hours and 20 minutes later, in the same location...**

"Right... Well, rift energy or whatever the fuck it is, is off the scale at this height on this building... Probably means that whatever came through, came through the wall and fell... into that bush" Tony said, pointing down at the innocent looking bush.

"Tony, for God's sake, can you see anything?" shouted Bruce, finally annoyed with the genius` snarky comments.

"Oh well, I`m sorry Doctor, the one time I was being serious, honestly..." replied Tony a faint hint of laughter tainted his sarcasm. He had finally started to irritate the doc, and it was about time in Tony`s point of view.

"Well, let`s inspect the shrubbery then!" said Thor, still clueless on the idea of sarcasm.

"Or... we could just ask the sleeping teenager under the tree if she saw anything?" said Natasha, laughing to herself at Stark finally missing something.

"Well... I was getting to her" Stark answered defensively, understanding that he had lost whatever competition they were currently taking part in.

The Avengers gathered around the sleeping girl, bemused by her state of unawareness. Tony took the initiative and picked up a nearby fallen branch to poke said sleeping girl with. He got a good five pokes in before she sat up and yelped:

"Arghh! Stop already! I do have an alarm clock, thanks Rufuszar"

Then she actually opened her eyes and saw that it was dusk, in a field, and she was staring straight at a guy holding a big stick. "Arghhh, enough with the surprises! What the hell is wrong with letting me sleep? I`m sore, I fell off a building... Y`know, maybe you lot could show some consideration!" she moaned sleepily.

"Wow, wait a moment, YOU fell off that building into that bush? Not some alien monster then? Unless, of course, you are an alien shape shifting monster, in which case no offense intended." babbled Stark, surprised.

"Yes, I fell off the bloody building and it REALLY made my day... NOT. Piss off before I stick that stick up your arse..." Hannah replied, grumpy, sleepy and not recognising who she was speaking to, due to the fact that it was almost dark out.

"Well ok then, Little Miss Grumpy, though I suppose I can understand the grumpiness, what with falling off a building and all that." Stark followed with easily as much snark. "Now can we please get to the introductions and official kidnapping/interrogating bit?"

"Stark, don`t scare her" Said Steve, clearly defending the unfortunate girl in front of him. "We're not kidnapping her!"

"Actually, in all technicality, we are, as we're taking her with or without her consent... So yeah." Stark replied.

"Urghhh, couldn`t care less, I don`t know where I am anyway, and there`s what, five of you?" she guessed, "I don`t stand much of a chance anyway, so as long as you have something for my back which I landed on, a bed for me to sleep on and you're FUCKING QUIET, I really don`t care. On second thoughts, you might have to help me up though, I`m a little stiff..."

"Well, that was easy my friends!" boomed Thor, clapping Tony and Steve on their backs before retreating towards the Quinjet that Natasha had flown to a nearby clearing.

**Loobylooxxx: Hey guys! Back story mentioned earlier being that the ****_lovely, kind, caring and considerate_**** crispyangelwings, who knew about my severe allergic reactions to plants(!) decided that I was the one who should collect a bunch of nettles for our Biology ISA. NOTE TO ANYBODY TRYING IT: PLASTIC GLOVES DO NOT PROTECT AGAINST STINGS! Anyway guys, hope you like the story, R+R, TTFN, Loobylooxxx and crispyangelwings *kisses***


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

**Hey look another update. Hannah meets the Avengers properly and surprise surprise I do not actually own the avengers, if I did there would be a lot more slash and why would I be writing this? ****With thanks to guest, guest and Fallen's child for reviewing****. And without much ado ( this time) I do present Chapter 3...**

**P.S Please enjoy **

**P.P.S Please review or I will send enraged Bilgesnipe after you **

**[B.N. By the way, unless you haven't figured this out, Loobylooxxx (me) is Hannah, and crispyangelwings is Rebecca]**

Hannah decided that waking up should be outlawed in all worlds; it only brought pain, misery and sorrow. In this case most definitely her pain and sorrow. It might have had a little to do with the three storey fall from a building, or with the fact that only a bush had stopped her fall. All she really remembered was Physics, blue mist, blurry space and then a building; maybe with some cool people in full Cosplay, like kidnapping her or something. With that thought, she promptly sat up, scaring the hell out of the two other people in the room. These two other people happened to be Banner and Stark, most unfortunately for Hannah`s head.

"Ok. Four options now. 1, this is a huge, very expensive, prank pulled off with extreme brilliance by Rebecca. 2, this is an alternate reality or universe or some shit and the strange blue mist brought me here. 3, this is a blue mist induced fever dream or hallucination, using pictures from my subconscious. 4, I`m dead and gone to fandom style heaven. Of the four options, Rebecca could never ever pull a prank this wacky and even she has some health and safety knowledge, or at least enough to merit not dropping me off a building. Not saying she isn`t brilliant. **[B.N. You narcissistic little...] **Hallucinations or fever dream could not explain falling off a three storey building as I have never done that before and do not wish to repeat said experience... So, one and three are out, that leaves two and four." Hannah said in a rush, startling the two men even further, before sinking back onto the bed to mull over the options left.

"Well as I`m not dead, or I don't think I am at least, and I don't think I'm a hallucination either, I would go with option two honestly, but I have not got the faintest clue what you`re on about so meh" added Tony, most unhelpfully.

"Tony shut it, she`s probably in shock..." Banner said.

"Actually no, it`s fine, it`s a shame that Rebecca`s not here actually, she`s a much bigger `vengers fangirl than I am, I mean all for the avengers and that but avengers vs supernatural... hands down Supernatural! Sorry; actually I think Rebecca is the same. Anyway... alternate universe was the better of the two options, even if does mean you`re not R.D.J." she said, pointing at Tony.

"Who is R.D.J. and why on earth would you prefer them to me?" Questioned Tony, inquisitively trying to think of anyone with the initials R.D.J. that he knew of. Coming up with nothing, he decided to let it pass. "And how the hell do you know about the initiative?"

"Tony leave the interrogation to the professionals, we still don`t know for sure that she is a friendly"

"I`m friendly honestly, though I do scream sometimes .and cry. Randomly. It`s the feels you know, that and spoilers. Though I don't seem to be getting those as much now that I've caught Rebecca up on Supernatural..." Hannah mused.

"Ehhhh, I`m a genius and I only understood like 10% of that sentence... Care to elaborate?" inquired Tony, perfectly at ease now that Hannah had confirmed what he had suspected about her being from somewhere else entirely.

"Well I`m friendly, duh, or I`d be like attacking you now, or cursing you, or exorcising you... Although you`re not a demon so in all technicality that would be rather pointless but disturbing to most people. Anyway, I occasionally scream because I`m a fangirl and that`s what we do, as well as burst into bouts of uncontrollable sobbing and laughter at the same time. And feels are just feels there are no words for their horrendous brilliance..."

"Ok, I understood more of that, but still do not understand, there are two options, shock or brain tumour. What think you doc?"

"Tony, it is not appropriate to talk about serious things like that, especially if she does have a brain tumour." Banner admonished, glaring at Tony.

"Eh sorry to interrupt, but as far as I`m aware I have no brain tumour and I`m only a mild fangirl, like minor-ish mild, but still quite a large fan, especially of the science bro shipiness! But anyway, in more recent news: any sudden reappearances of people other than me?" interrupted Hannah again.

"Well not yet, but we have hope still, or I do, the good doctor seems to be somewhat pessimistic. What are science bros?" inquired Tony, his thought train once again derailing at the mention of something he didn`t know about.

"Y`know Science Bros, Shipping, Canon, Ships, Oceans of Feels, Armada of Ships... That kind of thing?"

"Do you also wear eyepatches and parrots? Or is it strictly sailors only?" said Tony, trying to hide his utter confusion at what seemed like a load of seafaring terminology.

"I am going to try and ignore both of you now if you`re going to speak gobbledegook , and anyway Fury wants us all in the conference room, so off with you." Bruce said, waving an arm in the vague direction of the door before adding, "Tony don`t kill her, or scare her too much and I`ll be along in a moment."

"Bye doc" chorused Tony and Hannah as they left the room, the door swinging shut automatically behind them. They walked down the corridor in silence, both thinking about what was happening in their personal lives at the minute. Hannah was excited to properly meet the Avengers (minus Hawkeye she assumed), and she just wished she had someone to fangirl with her. Tony was wondering when he would get to speak to this Rebecca, and if she knew more about what was going on and could speak more English and less boat-stuff.

Fortunately for Hannah and Tony, in a blue mist between worlds, a hole could be seen, the end to the infernal tunnel of blue and purple swirliness.

"This is probably going to hurt..."

Back in the conference room however, there was, well, a conference. The Avengers or what would become known as the Avengers were meeting to discuss the new portal-shaped problem.

"So what you`re saying is that this portal could re-open at any time and someone, or something else could drop out?" sighed Director Fury. "Well I really hope that you have a plan to sort out this mess Doctor."

"I don`t have a plan but it shouldn't be too difficult to place some agents in the surrounding area and probably take Hannah too. Anyone falling through should want to see a friendly face." answered Bruce, "Add to that the fact that, according to Hannah, the nearest person to her was Rebecca, someone who knows even more about the Avengers, and that`s from someone who says they know very little."

"Well then Hannah, what can you tell us?" said Steve, the first thing he had actually said on entry to the room.

"Sorry boys and girls, spoilers." was the only reply they got from her.

"Well then, we are sending Stark and Rodgers with Hannah here, to New Orleans-"

"Wow! No one told me we were in America! That`s so cool! I actually did get to America before Rebecca, oh shit, better not tell her that she has spoilers too, more than I have, crap!" interrupted Hannah, suddenly realising her impending doom.

"Well then if you`ve finished..." finished Fury patiently "You need to be leaving in about five minutes."

The hole at the other end of the portal was getting larger, Rebecca could see a hint of sky and trees, the light also gave her enough light to look at where she actually was –in this case barely was, an entire galaxy of stars passing her in each second, then the black spaces, voids in between.

"Oh, no way I am not universe jumping, please no, they might not be on season nine yet! But they could have Season three..." It was more to comfort herself at this point, than for any actual reason. "I really hope this is the same place as where Hannah went or I`ll be all alone..."

And with the fast approaching drop, Rebecca decided she really did like the portal and would gladly never leave, especially if it meant avoiding the three storey drop into a tree.

**Authors note: The storyline for the avengers has been stretched timewise to make room for all the awesomeness that has been added.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

**Hey look another another update that`s two in two days wow. Tony, Bruce and Hannah get to the portal site just in time to see another traveller and trees become incredibly dangerous. All in this weeks episode of... who am I kidding this is no TV drama, if it was I might have a slight chance of owning the characters. Thank you to KittyCatt1036 and Fallen's child for reviewing, and here is chapter 4:**

**P.S Please review, enjoyment is not necessary for the survival of this story although much appreciated.**

So on a plane with an egotistical mad inventor with a powerful suit and a highly dangerous when enraged doctor, could be worse was Hannah`s approximate summary of the situation. There were of course good points like it was very likely that Rebecca would be through the portal soon and she was in fandom style heaven as far as she was concerned. Plus there were no parents or enraged cats nearby to randomly maul her (the cats not the parents).

"So Hannah, what can you tell us for certain without blowing a hole in the time vortex?" Asked Tony snarkily sat opposite Hannah in the quinjet.

"Wait you watch Doctor who?"

"Er no.."

"Oh you so do, that`s brilliant where are they up to over here? Please past the 50th anniversary special but that`s not exactly likely seeing as we weren`t up to there so... But anyway I don`t actually know what has happened recently so I would appreciate an overview of where we`re up to." She replied liking his shocked expression as he realised that no one had bothered to tell her what had been going on.

"Ok well this evil green dude came through a biiig blue portal" Said Tony gesticulating wildly with his hands to make his point "He killed people stole a smaaaall glowy cube and ran off with a purple hawk and a mad physicist"

"So you haven`t found him yet but you were both on the helicarrier implying that Doctor Banner was setting up the face trace when I arrived and you shouldn`t actually be here" She finalised for him.

"What do you mean" Said Doctor Banner finally looking up at Hannah from his tablet, caught up in her words.

"It`s simple really in the film Stark doesn`t arrive until you`ve caught Loki for the first time" Hannah said answering quickly and without thinking as if being tested. "Oh crap didn`t mean to say that much sorry forget it."

"So we catch Loki at least twice, you know all the terminology and what`s happening because someone somewhere made a film, and I`m in it. Do I have a big role?" Questioned Stark eagerly.

"Yes there are a series of films about the Avengers, and you have one of the starring roles, or well RDJ has. Happy?" Answered Hannah

"Nope more questions that apparently you can answer, who is RDJ? What about Bruce? And how much do you know about me?" He asked suspiciously

"Easiest question first RDJ is an actor, one of the best paid in the film industry, RDJ stands for Robert Downey Junior. Secondly Bruce has a big role too, and I`m not certain how much I should be telling you of what comes before. And finally I know quite a bit about, what I can remember anyway. Happy now?"

"I have a question actually, how much do you know about me?" Asked Bruce

"I`m not actually sure as there are two different films with varying storylines and the Avengers so its a bit confusing in relation to you. Sorry"

"No, it`s OK I don`t think you could have done anything about it, maybe we should have a chat about somewhere else sometime." Replied Bruce

"Yeah Ok I will tell you what I know and then you can correct me if I`m wrong or whatever."

"Actually Bruce" Interrupted Tony "That could be seen as asking her on a date you know? We wouldn`t want anyone to get the wrong impression"

"Tony please, just stop already we`re here." Said Hannah blushing furiously

"You would recognise the shrubbery wouldn`t you?" was his only reply

After everyone had left the quinjet and Bruce had set up the lab with little help from Tony, everyone decided they would go and sit outside as little needed to be done as there was nothing to be analysed. Of course it would be the second that everyone got outside that they saw a hole rip open in the sky and a figure drop through- straight into a tree.

"Great timing" Joked Tony as they sprinted to the tree

"I just hope it`s Rebecca and not Claire" replied Hannah

As they reached said tree it became obvious- to Hannah at least -that it was Rebecca if they string of barely understandable swearwords were anything to go by. Tony proceeded to cock an ear and said "I swear that was elvish"

"I hope so, if she starts swearing in troll or dwarven again I will actually decapitate her."

"I`m not certain whether you`re joking or not, and anyway how do you swear in troll?"

"I`m sure you can ask for a demonstration" Hannah said as they reached the outer fringes of what was a large oak tree.

Rebecca- as it was of course Rebecca- was hanging upside down by the backs of her knees groaning with her arms dangling down holding a bag in each hand.

"Hi Hannah nice to see you – look I brought your bag" She then promptly swung her arm and released the bag so it hit Hannah in the chest before dropping her own bag and backflipping off the branch in a weirdly graceful manner, landing feet first on the ground before picking up her bag.

"Hannah there are three options of which only one is viable: Death, Hallucination or alternate universe; I`m not dead or you wouldn`t be here, I wouldn`t hallucinate falling into a tree even if RDJ was there so I`m in an alternate universe which is backed up by the weird blue mist and the portal, also the gaps in what I think was the time vortex though I might be wrong." Said Rebecca pausing to take a breath then proceeding with "In which case holy shit because that is actually Tony fucking Stark and the Avengers are here, we are in America, and this is just so awesome."

"Hannah you were right- she is brilliant" Finalised Tony


End file.
